Pup Tails: Boston Terrier Struggles With Pup-Peroni Addiction

4-year-old Boston Terrier, Scout Haverford, recently admitted he has a problem. The little dog can’t sleep at night without tasting the beefy goodness of his Pup-Peroni treats. His entire life revolves around receiving and consuming the treats to the point where he cannot function normally. He has an addiction.

Scout’s owner, Trisha Haverford, explained “I got him one bag of Pup-Peroni and figured he’d be fine. But he won’t stop, it’s the only thing he wants.” She recalls going to bed at night only to wake up to the sound of Scout falling off the kitchen counter after an attempt to jump up to the treats. When that attempt continued to fail miserably, he began staring at Trisha while she slept to coerce her into getting the treats. If she tried to lock him out of the room, he’d scratch the door until she couldn’t take it any longer.

“He stopped eating his canned food, stopped wanting to go for walks, and stopped wanting to chase his toys, Pup-Peroni is his life.” Trisha sadly admitted. After he managed to consume an entire bag of the treat, Scout realized he had a serious problem. He is desperately trying to kick the addiction, but he stays up all night trembling in anticipating of the next time he’ll get his fix. Nothing compares to the feeling he gets when he eats Pup-Peroni and he can’t give up that feeling.

“They aren’t good for him, he’s gaining weight and his mood swings are terrible.” Trisha said. She refuses to purchase Pup-Peroni any longer and is forcing Scout to quit cold turkey. He responded by tearing up the entire kitchen in search of one last crumb, just to get a taste. Trisha is currently looking into doggie hypnosis programs that could help lead him on a road of recovery.

Pup Tails: Dog Publishes Guide On Pooping Strategy in America

Twelve-year-old Beagle, Edgar Lyons, is set to release his published guidebook on pooping theory next week. This book will include tips on pooping location, what situations are great for pooping and when to make sure to leave a poop indoors. Edgar was inspired to write this book after his own struggle with pooping decisions as well as the experiences he witnessed of other dogs.

Edgar’s owner, Kristen Lyons, walks him every morning for nearly three miles. During those three miles, Edgar is forced to make the crucial decision of where to place his poop. Using his nose, he will sniff vigorously to decide which spot is most appropriate and will nest the poo. In his book he explains how he always hopes that Kristen will leave the poop in the grass so that his scent will remain. Unfortunately, she most often bags it and throws it into “various unknown portals.”

In certain situations, Edgar feels that it is not necessary for a dog to poop even though they might need to. In his book he writes “If your owner seems rushed or stressed out, make sure to hold your poop in and take it at a later time indoors.” He believes that if an owner is not in the right mindset, the poop will not be properly executed. For this reason, it is necessary for a dog to wait and poop in privacy indoors, on a favorite item. “This will assure the most serene and enjoyable experience for the dog and the owner.”

Kristen openly disagrees with the ideology in Edgar’s publication, proclaiming, “Pooping to him is a production, he can’t just go and keep walking like a normal dog. All of this thought is unnecessary!” Edgar believes that attitudes like Kristen’s leave dogs afraid to express themselves properly while doing their business. He hopes that by sharing his experience, he may give more dogs the strength to stand up for themselves.

Edgar’s book also features a detailed chapter on the best pooping locations for a dog’s personality type.  He writes: “Shyer dogs may prefer going under a bush to have some privacy and less risk of scent exposure.”  He further explains the importance of finding a location that smells exactly right, and that no dog should settle for anything less than perfect. Kristen hopes that after reading this book she may figure out how to get Edgar to stop pooping in her shoes.

Pup Tails: Dog Becomes Artist’s New Muse

Hubble Miller was just an ordinary grey dog waiting to be adopted at a small New Jersey shelter–until one day. An aspiring artist, Samuel Outer, wandered through looking for inspiration and found Hubble to be the most beautiful sight he’d ever seen. Outer immediately adopted Hubble and rushed to get to work on his doggy artwork.

“Hubble is a large, stoic and majestic creature,” Outer described, “He will be the biggest inspiration for my new collection of artwork.” Outer has lived in the outskirts of Newark for years and planned on opening his own art gallery. As many artists struggle to create, Outer lacked the motivation to get started on his goal. Hubble’s story inspired him to create again and produce an entire exhibit around the dog, entitled “Ruff Life.”

Hubble was raised in a group of stray dogs on the sides of a railroad track in upstate New York. He found himself living the life of a drifter, surviving on squirrel after squirrel. He lived for the days where the gang would catch larger deer or foxes. Unfortunately he became injured when a fox slashed him in the leg. Hubble could no longer keep up with the pack and they left him behind.

He was brought to the shelter weeks later, hungry and tired. They fixed up his leg and fed him his desperately desired canned food. “Hubble’s story is the reality of so many dogs these days, his sadness speaks to me.” Outer has had difficulty executing his painting plans because Hubble refuses to pose, sit, stay or cooperate in any fashion. The one piece of art that Outer completed took him nearly two years. “I had to paint in two minute intervals because that was how long it took Hubble to figure out how to get the piece of steak I dangled in front of him.”

While Hubble is happy in his new home, he may be sick of serving as a muse. He is currently on a posing strike and refuses to go near Samuel’s painting room for fear of torture games involving pieces of meat.