Pup Tails: Pug Formally Requests Name Change

Four-year-old pug, Spunky Bradford, is sick of not being taken seriously. After years of putting up with torment, being mistaken for a female, and facing an identity crisis, Spunky had to take action. He wants his new name to reflect the sophisticated animal that he is, so he chose Archibald.

The process of legally changing a dog’s name is fairly simple: the owners must start calling the dog by a different name and hope he responds. There is no legal process for the situation, but Spunky is taking it seriously nonetheless. His owners, Glen and Kathleen Bradford, said “We thought Spunky was a cute name, but his personality doesn’t really fit it.”

Spunky is, in fact, not spunky at all. He spends 90 percent of his day sleeping and only leaves the house to use the restroom. He hates walks because he hates panting and any sort of physical activity. He prefers fancy dinners, watching nightly news and observing cars pass in front of his window. Spunky is interested in high society and his owners are puzzled as to why this desire formed. “We just like to eat wings and watch football, we rarely do anything that could be considered sophisticated,” the Bradfords admitted.

Spunky has stopped responding to his name altogether and will only respond to Archibald. Unfortunately, the Bradfords are having a hard time figuring out what name Spunky wants to be called because he can’t speak. “Spunky has been entirely unresponsive for the past few weeks, we think he might have lost his hearing.” They said in sadness “We want to help him but there isn’t much we can do.” This confusing situation has left Spunky more frustrated than ever, and it seems as though he may never become Archibald after all.


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