Dear Dewey/Doodlebug/Shuffleupagus/Mr. Most Handsome,

Dear Dewey/Doodlebug/Shuffleupagus/Mr. Most Handsome,

You weren’t supposed to be my dog. Even though I thought you were the most perfect puppy I’d ever seen, but didn’t want to get too close because you were supposed to be Dad’s buddy. That lasted all of four minutes. When I sat down on the floor, in the midst of all the puppies running around the floor, the most magical thing happened. You picked me. You walked over to me and lay down with your head on my foot. You fell asleep and I fell in love. Dad never stood a chance with the two of us

It’s been over eleven years and you are asleep with your head on my foot as I type this. There were times when I didn’t think either of us was going to make it. When you got sick after your Parvo vaccine and the vet finally said there was nothing more to do for you, that you had to decide to survive, I decided for you. I didn’t let you out of my arms. Mom and Dad would try to get me to leave you alone, saying that you needed to nap in peace. I didn’t buy it. You slept in my arms just fine. I knew that you needed to feel loved if you were going to stick around and you did. You stayed with me and have paid me back in spades. Through the worst days of years of depression, when all I had was you, you were enough. You were enough to convince me to take it one day at a time, to crawl out of bed when all I wanted was to hide from the world, to take care of you when I couldn’t take care of myself. You slowly brought laughter back into my life. Your cancer scare was one of the worst times of my life because I thought you were leaving me. Seeing you with all of the surgical incisions from having seven lumps removed, in so much pain just to walk, I didn’t know if I could take it because I didn’t know how you could stand to hurt so much. You were so brave, though, as long as I was there with you. Even now, with your kidneys starting to fail and your eyesight getting worse, I know we don’t have as much time as I want left, but I know you’re ok as long as we’re together.

Just the thought of your face makes me smile. You are so perfect. You’re the most handsome boy in the world! I can’t wait to get home to you to see your goofy self and hear all about your day as I walk in the door. Your howling ‘talk’ might get on some people’s nerves, but I love it. It reminds me of how much you love me and how much you need me and how lucky I am to have you. You let me sit on the couch with you. You let me sleep in my bed with you. You let me sing you silly songs about you and don’t even care how dorky they are (although I happen to think the Dewey version of ‘he’ll Be Coming ‘Round the Mountain’ is sheer genius). You cuddle with me when I’m upset or just to be close. When I’m sick, you keep watch, staring at me from the other pillow on the bed. I love when you puff your cheeks repeatedly when you’re annoyed. I love that you will lift up your leg when I walk past you, insisting on a belly rub. I love that you make snow angels in the snow over and over and over again. I love that you will lie down on the sofa and push people off when you are tired and want people to leave the house. I love everything about you and I will spend the rest of your life proving it to you because you picked me.


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